“Needy is Creepy” – Steve Chandler taught me this phrase and it changed my life as a Professional Coach.
Steve shared the following in our book, The Prosperous Coach:
“You will have a hard time really hearing your client if your own mind is occupied by your own needs, as in, “I need this client, I need this money so badly, I really can’t afford to lose this client, I’ll discount, I’ll do anything, I’ll become desperate—I really need it.”
If you’ve got this sense of extreme need in your mind, your behavior and your communication is going to push the person away. That’s because neediness is creepy.
We don’t want to be needy. We want to have it be the opposite. We want to talk and think deeply about the client’s world, not ours. The sale always occurs inside the client’s world.
If my client says, “Well, I’m going to think about this, I’ll get back to you,” I don’t want to keep calling and emailing this person like I’m needing this work. Anything needy is creepy to the other person. Human need in the world of business is really off‑putting. It causes people to not want to work with you. So it must be stopped.
Many times I have my clients who are coaches put on their computer the phrase “needy is creepy” just to remind them. Because look what people do. They check in, they touch base, they annoy people: “I’m just checking in. I’m just touching base. I’m just trying to find out if you are going to work with me. I’m just trying to find out if you are going to be my client,” and that’s really uncomfortable to another person.
We want to practice different ways to stay connected. We want to explore ways to deliver value in each communication. We practice these different approaches when we communicate because we’ll get clients so much faster that way.
If you haven’t heard back, send a gift and a note. Don’t even refer to working together. Contribute and serve. You don’t need them; they need you. Behave accordingly.”
Want to see what ‘needy’ looks like?
DON’T BE LIKE MIKEY!