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Who You Are Speaks So Loudly, I Can’t Hear What You’re Saying

Bob Hoffman is known as The Ad Contrarian and he just wrote a little piece that made me laugh out loud:

I walk into a crowded party.

“Can I have everyone’s attention, please. I just want you all to know that I am the handsomest man in America.”

What I have SAID is that I am an amazingly good looking guy. But what I have COMMUNICATED is that I am a giant, flaming asshole.

What a funny and beautiful distinction between what we SAY and what we COMMUNICATE.


The job of an extraordinary coach is to bring gentle awareness of this distinction to our clients.

Listen BENEATH the words of your clients’ to discover their heart’s desires and their inner wisdom.

Listen to what their behavior tells you they are ACTUALLY committed to, not what they SAY they want.

Don’t answer your clients’ questions, discover the questions they’ve never dared to ask out loud.

Dive so deep that they share with you things they’ve never told another living soul.

They’ll probably cry.

Be ok with tears. They’ll thank you later. And then (gently) dive deeper still. Don’t listen to their words, listen for who they BE.

And then remind them that they are far more powerful than they could imagine.

Don’t be a coach. Be an extraordinary coach.

Love. Rich

P.S. Join our commuinty of extraordinary coaches at The Fearless Coaching Intensive in April. If you haven’t already reserved your ticket, join our wait list now and be the first to have access to the remaining seats when we open registration again mid-January. Join the wait list here:

PS. Project Kairos just began but it’s not too late to join me. You’ll get the recordings of the calls you miss. Master Creating Clients in the last Project Kairos I will ever run. Sign up now, and you still get a gift ticket to my upcoming program: $100K Clients


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